No Offense Taken Part - 3

How many times have we created issues that may have not been there or taken offense when none was meant?



I was in a church related meeting for women. One woman related a story how when she was growing up about how people in her community church had offended her and she felt judged by some. Then, she moved back to that area when she was married and had a baby on the way. The same church offered to give her a baby shower and she refused the offer stating that they "Were trying to be nice now that she was what they expected her to be but didn't love and accept her as a teen." My guess is that one or two may have judged her but the majority probably were busy with their own lives and really didn't notice much. I would guess that over the years, not many if any gave her a thought. However, she obviously has given it much thought over the years causing her pain continually over and over. What is sadder still is that they probably really did want to give her a shower and help a new mother ready herself for a baby.



She lost out on a great opportunity to heal her broken heart and allow others to do a service that may have been healing for some of them as well. It was obvious that this woman had more children and was older as she spoke of these events in her past and how sad that she still needs to share her hurt with others.

When I had my second baby, I had a horrible experience and whenever I was given the opportunity, I would share the horrors of it and could top most delivery stories. While in nursing school, we were touring the labor and delivery floor and I started to share the experience with my nursing instructor. She cut me off and said, "It sounds like you are still hurting and need to let that experience go."



I was so taken back. I had never had anyone confront me like that and I realized that I was using the experience to be a victim and keep myself in that state. I worked on forgiving the Doctor and staff that caused the situation and after awhile was able to forgive them. It was so freeing to be able to let that go and not have to tell the story and relive that situation over and over.



I have found that when we have to tell and retell a story, it drains us, keeps the situation alive, drives others away as they really don't want to hear it over and over, and keeps us from moving forward in a healthy way. It keeps us damned or stagnant. To be damned means to not move forward and not progress. If we are stuck to situations where we keep reliving and retelling the story, we are damned. The person who offended has moved on but we are stuck and unable to move forward.



So, from these experiences and others, I have learned to TRY (I am still working on this:-) to overcome hurts and offenses quickly and forgive as soon as possible as we are the one's that are damned if we hold on and don't forgive.



I hope the damn stops here and that the "Living Water" can once again flow taking us to a new path never before taken.....