I have not had all the girls home together in a long time where we didn't have something big going on or that we have only had them all here for a day or so. I asked the girls if we could somehow get them all down here for a few days to go through the holiday decorations and coats in the closet etc.
Since Princess Five will be serving as a missionary for the next 18 months, I knew I wouldn't be able to go through all the stuff we had s
aved for the next two years and I would like to be able to move at some point but since I am a storage facility until they all get married, I feel like my life is on hold. I asked them all to come down and help me get through the stuff that any of them may want so that if I did choose to move or downsize, I could do that without feeling like I was getting rid of something they may want.
I know I have a large house full of stuff, but I have all my mothers stuff that still needs going through and there is something of hers in nearly every room of the house and I want to be able to get it all scanned, recorded and gone, but that will take months of constant attention. The things that I can get rid of that no one is using, are all the decorations I have.
The older girls remember all the decorations I made at different craft nights and hosting women's activities and many years of running a boutique where I would sell my own crafts. After my divorce, I didn't have time for that. Even putting decorations up was difficult. I went to a pre-lit fake tree from my real trees and bought all new tree decorations. I never put up the old as pulling it all out and putting it back was so time consuming and I had court dates, and drill competitions and so many other things around the holidays, that I just couldn't expend more energy. For many years, we only had a tree and stockings up. Once Princess Five asked me why all the other families had decorated houses with lights and we didn't. I told her that it was too much work. The holidays lost sparkle for them after that time.
I have posted about that and how we tried to fix that situation by making fun memories and new decorations. I knew the older girls wanted some of the decorations from the past and that the younger girls wouldn't remember any of those decorations. However, I needed them all there to go through what I did have so no one would feel they didn't have a say in getting something they wanted.
We pulled out all the ski jackets, back packs, Easter, Halloween, Christmas decorations and books and some bathroom drawers and I feel like it was cathartic for us all in different ways to be able to let go of things that had memories that were good and bad.
Each girl had a tote of memories and I had purchased them each a handmade quilt years back and they were all able to choose one. I just love how the girls were considerate of each others feelings about things and if one got one thing they wanted, they were willing to allow another to have something they may have wanted but knew the other wanted more.
I have always tried to make things equal for the girls and they always joke about the other siblings being my favorite. They all know that I have done my best to make sure that each got my attention when needed, and that they are all my favorite in different ways. I really was stressed about going through everything with them and could see that a few of them were stressed about going through things as well. Prince One was so good to take the kids out for an afternoon of shopping and treats so all the girls could be there to get through it all as we basically had one afternoon / evening to get through it all.
Princess One's family was here just over 24 hours total and yet we were able to get through everything on my list of desired items. They each filled one tote with cute knitted baby sweaters, decorations that had memories, books they enjoyed on the holidays, ski jackets, and other fun items. They all got a few decorations to take with them for the upcoming holidays and I have FIVE huge over filled totes of stuff to get rid of as well from the basement decoration bins. I have about 7 more bags / totes of stuff from the rest of the house that I weeded out and more coats, snow bibs, backpacks and home décor stuff.
I have so far to go yet to get the house where I want it in case I decide to move, but it feels good to be able to know that if I do want to move, I can just get rid of what I want as the girls have chosen what they would want. There were a few things they said they wanted to keep at my house for their kids but I told them that I would rather have them have and use them so if I decide to move or if something happened to me, they would KNOW that they could just donated it all without hesitation or needing to sort or go through each tote or bin. I think that doing this has maybe helped them see that I have done what I needed to get them where they are, but now, maybe I can start to live my life again and travel or go do service as they are all moving on to live their own lives.
I am exhausted and my house looks like a tornado went through but it is a good feeling to let go of "stuff" that has memories attached and to start fresh...…
I am blessed with some amazing girls.... God has been good to me!
Have a blessed and clutter free day!
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